29 December 2010

36 Weeks

Dear Baby Girl~
Oh sweet love, we are all in such anticipation to finally meet you and add you to our family! We can't wait to see what you look like and how your little personality is surely going to charm us to pieces. In one way it's hard to believe we're getting so close to your due date. But in another way, it seems we've been waiting for you so long. I already feel so blessed to be your Mama. And having the chance to carry you all nestled in my tummy has been a true joy. I have had a quiet awareness during this pregnancy that it will most likely be my last. And despite all the aches & pains I've complained about for several months (mostly tummy aches and heartburn pains), I will remember this time with you with such sweetness. I have always dreamed of having two children close together in age. So baby girl, you are nothing short of a dream come true.

Artwork by Erin Darcy

I so love the way this picture depicts where I am at right now. I saw it on a blog I read a little over a year ago...before you were even a twinkle in my eye. I can remember the way my heart beat with longing to be so richly blessed. One baby hugging Mama tightly, a little piece of this grand gift of motherhood. While another babe grows inside, a mystery and reminder of the way life and love can swell and grow. Your sister has never been much of a cuddler....but, lately she has become very attached to Mama and quite cuddly. I find myself carrying her more and having more snuggly rocking chair breaks during the day than we have in a while. And I have cherished every minute of it (thankfully without hurting my back!).

When I see this picture and remember how it sparked something inside of me, I am humbled into deep gratitude. It wasn't very long ago at all that I knew the true pain of aching arms. I never knew I could hurt so much losing something I never fully had. All the days and nights of wondering if I would ever carry a baby in my belly or my arms. And now to be doing both! It leaves me with no other words than "thank you." Thank you, God, for these gifts of life. And thank you, sweet girls, for choosing us to be with.

Another thing we're all anxious to see is how Zoë is going to react when "sisser" is finally here. I keep telling people that I don't really think she has any idea of what's going on. But, she continues to surprise me by talking about you all the time. She is already able to point out your cradle and carseat. And she knows when I pack away her clothes from the following season they are going to be "sisser's." When I ask her when sister is coming she'll say "no now, soon." But by far the sweetest thing she's done was when I had a doctors appointment the other day. Daddy told her before I left that I was going to "check on sister." So when I got home she ran in the kitchen to meet me, looked me up and down and said, "'ere's sisser?" Where's sister, indeed?! You can see, little one, we are ALL ready for you to be here.